Kudzu Ate The Off-ramp: A Brief Visit to Tennessee

View from Roan Mountain

Over the river and through the woods, our Garmin has gone astray....No, seriously, in Roan Mountain State Park, the GPS had us traversing the forest on the other side of the stream instead of the perfectly good road we were actually on. Such is life in east Tennessee, but well worth the effort you put into making it a destination.

My wife and I found ourselves there as a result of a conference she was attending in Knoxville. I had to occupy myself while she was at the gathering, but we took an extra few days together in truly rural east Tennessee afterwards. We can now attest to the legend that is southern hospitality, and are likely to return for further explorations if we can avoid the tourist traps, which are equally legendary, from Gatlinburg to Dollywood.

We arrived by plane on a Sunday, got the rental car, and headed into downtown Knoxville, spending the whole ride trying to find something other than an on-air church service over the radio. Good luck with that. Our trusty GPS guided us to at least two restaurants that were closed, so we finally just parked (for free on weekends) in a big lot and set out on foot. We settled on The Crown & Goose, a well-patronized establishment, practically an institution if you ask around. The hostess greeted us by welcoming us to the restaurant's last day of existence. I wish I were making this up, but it was true. The place was closing to make way for part of some much larger development on the horizon. I think I recall something about a new sports complex and entertainment district, the kind of thing that often signals the death knell for local businesses in favor of chains.

We learned of this by striking up a conversation with another couple, their son and ("hopefully") soon-to-be daughter-in-law. We were all enjoying the warm sun outside while waiting for seating inside because despite the sun it was pretty chilly. You cannot say that about the people, though, as everyone is warm and friendly and will talk to you like they have known you all their lives. This stereotypical aspect of the south is most welcome, and something other regions should strive for. Sure, it was a Sunday, and just about anyone is more laid back on the weekend, but still.

Volunteer Landing, downtown Knoxville

Downtown Knoxville is perhaps not quite as vibrant as some city centers, but you will not go hungry or lack for entertainment, or visual stimulation thanks to the mix of history and architecture and public art. Nothing is overwhelming, and it says great things about the city that they are not prone to overstatement....except for the University of Tennessee. Lots of orange, lots of orange, but I digress. I thought my hometown of Portland, Oregon was clean, but Knoxville, and for that matter every other place we went, may get polished daily. I remember maybe one piece of litter in over a week, and given my tendency to spy trash while looking for birds and other wildlife, that is saying something. Other cities bent on beautification projects should put Knoxville on the "must visit" list.

U.S. Courthouse, downtown Knoxville

It is virtually impossible to find fault with anything in east Tennessee. I mean, I got nothin'. Seriously. You have to have been a long-term resident to have complaints, and they do have complaints, mostly about traffic and construction, and sometimes disrespecting human and natural history in their haste to put up a new housing development or something. Gentrification is an issue everywhere, and apparently the Knoxville area is not immune. Ok, we were there during an election cycle, and politics are ugly there, too, judging from the campaign advertisements.

Farther afield, toward Johnson City and more rural hamlets, you might not be able to get a quorum to reach a consensus of complaints. Unless and until you stop in at a diner, it is easy to imagine that everyone is on their own up in the hills and hollers. Abandoned houses, barns, and outbuildings are quickly overwhelmed by kudzu, and I can only wonder what would happen if you didn't leave your home for a couple of days. Would you still be able to open the front door? No matter, the locals no doubt turn every obstacle and negative event into a running joke. You just get that vibe that there is nothing that can't be overcome with a little ingenuity and a lot of laughter.

Blackberry Blossom Inn, Unicoi